There is apparently a major rumor online that Barack Obama is a secret lizard person. I’ve found blog articles in places like this that support the conclusion, and about half of the traffic on the lizard person twitter search represents discussion of lizards and Obama, and sometimes even Romney.
This is bad news if it’s true – An election dominated by two lizard people is definitely going to further the bad ends of our country and we’re really in trouble then! Luckily, Obama is NOT a lizard person. I know this because his jaw and torso are all wrong. Have you ever seen a tall, skinny lizard? I haven’t either. Reptiles can be tall but they’re huge if so, not skinny or lanky like Obama. Additionally, he’s lacking the lizard jaw and throat that is so well documented in the photos of this blog – There’s no chance he could swallow a human child whole with a tiny jaw like that.
So let’s keep it straight: Obama is not a lizard person.